Now i guess he get what i'm trying to say to him all this while...i know it kind of shocked for him to find out that i said its his last chance of getting me back... i can't be carry on being this way.. i got a life too... i didnt mean it bad... but i have to do this when the time really comes... not once, i've been thru the same problem... this is going to be the third... the same trick, the same move, the same words, the same probs...
I know his intention was sincere but sometime he have to force himself to choose... it kind of hard, i know.. i've been thru that... All i can say is that... if he is sincere enouf with his feeling, n he really have the intention of coming back, n he want to be with me in other times, plz... i beg him plz.... do something... I dont want him to come n go as and when he like again... put in effort... lots of effort... Thing are not going to be easier than you think...
With the presence of "his girl-close-friend" in the picture, everything have change... i'm not putting fault in her... cause i guess she dont know what happening... n even so from what i hear or write... i guess she cant control her feeling... i know how it feel like to be with someone start to show care n concern... Being friend with absolute no feeling is a different story... being friend with a bit of liking feeling for another is totally a different story... so having it, my mind now is filled with negative tots... the only way they haf to prove me wrong... really haf to convience me that what i think is all bullshit...
I hate this kind of battle, whereby i have to fight over him... some time i do pity the opponent... Cause i know i'm going to lose.. n even if i lose, i still win... cause quietly he will find me even when he's with the opponent... *wink*... i'm not trying to be proud over that.. cause people will say that i'm being a bitch here... i know i am... you dont need to say all that...
I guess i need to advise him again.. "if your trying to find my replacement, please find someone beeter off than me"... what i mean by that... someone who are better looking... pretty... good attitude... good in love... able to give him happiness.. able to love him more than i love him... able to make him a better person.. able not to give him problem...
I dont mind him being with another girl... or i dont mind even to leave him due to a better girl... but for once i hear a problem that can make n me hate the girl... thats it... i'll have to come to the rescue... like it or not.. i know i'm being as busybody in every of his love life... but what do i care... I just hate the person who can't give him happiness.. who make fun of his sincere love... who make a fool out of him... who make him more naive in love... please to people who willing to be with him.... PLEASE take care of him n his feelings.. dun ever make him feel unhappy... n Begging u girls... if u can do this... i guess u cant... TRY TO SACRIFICE THINGS MORE THAN ME... LOVE HIM MORE THAN HOW I LOVE HIM... then form there you guys can be save...
This is the thing that i ask for if things really going to happen... i'm now feeling the lost.. i'm still afraid of facing the real fact... cause i guess for now, he dont know what in her heart.. one day, he will know.. trust me... he can start to feel what she feel.. then there is where i have to step in if thing going to start... i'm really fighting the battle... just like people fighting over SARS... its scary rite... this is how its going to be... n even if i lose again, like i say it his last...
well actually no... i still can accept him with open arms... but it all takes time... Yes!he's my x... but once he's someone's else lover... i have to be out... but one omore thing... i can only accept him like how i let him go... accept him clean... on how i leave him, that how i want to accept him... once i hear him does thing further than anything, all doors will be close... sori is all i can say... i can forgive.. but can never forget...
So remember this nas, is never going to be easier for youy to come back to me again... all i have to ask is that you prove me wrong with actions... actions speack louder than words, rite... so be it... do it... any words, i'll hardly believe... i'm sori if i have to this to you... dun think that i'm not happy with you.. but i juz dun like the presence of new person... i guess u too wont like it if there's sumone trying to take over ur place...
posted by SilentSoul at
6:18 PM
